Last month Walker and I (and countless others) were stuck in the middle of a horrible fire-storm, and while we were incredibly lucky to have lost neither home nor workplace, my health was not so fortunate.
A week into the fires I found myself weaker and more physically taxed than I thought possible. I had reached the ground-zero of all my ground-zeroes experienced in the past…and that is saying something.
When I use the term “ground zero” I mean that I have to completely start over with any and all exercises, weight gain, muscle building, and any other kind of physical progress that I had preciously achieved. It means I’m back to only weighing 70lbs, back to not being strong enough to do even a single one of my necessary exercises, and back to needing help with even standing up.
In other words, “Ground Zero” means something really hard, really painful, and really, really discouraging…especially when it happens for the 4th time in 1 year.
But this is life for me right now, and even if I don’t like it I’m still responsible for how I choose to respond to it. I’ve had to decide, again, to try to make the most out of and see the best in everything. And I’ve also had to make difficult-but-necessary decisions regarding where I currently can and cannot afford to invest my energy…
And that is the reason for this blog post. I just wanted to let everyone know that until my health allows otherwise, I no longer have the strength to give personal or individual updates to people regarding my life or my health, whether through email, Facebook, Facebook messages, phone calls, or texts, but will have to direct everyone here, to my blog, for updates instead.
For the last couple months I’ve been trying to juggle both blogging and communicating with people through other means, but it simply has not been working for me. I have so little energy each day and so much to try and remember to do with just medications, doctor’s visits, and treatments alone…and I’ve found that I literally cannot juggle anything else currently.
If I focus on everyone else, I’m unable to take care of my health, but if I take care of my health, I will be unable to invest energy elsewhere, and unfortunately I don’t have the luxury of in betweens or happy mediums right now. Instead, I have to make a choice…It’s either my health, husband, and home, or it’s everything else.
So that is why all of my keeping-in-touch-with-people energy will be going to my blog from here on out. Whenever I have a little bit of extra energy to spare, I’ll write up updates and prayer requests, and hopefully I’ll sometimes even be able to blog on other things that have been on my heart and mind as well!
One thing I want to say, though, is please do leave comments here on the blog! If you have a question you would like me to answer in future posts, or if you have questions/comments from a particular post that I’ve already written, I would love to receive them and will be replying to those.
I also want to say that I love snail-mail! Receiving something in the mail is one of the most encouraging things for someone who is stuck at home nearly 24/7/365 from chronic illnesses, and if questions are asked in snail mail, I will send short replies, though it often will take me some time to do so.
Annnnd of course, for those who have my husband’s number, texting Walker is the best way to reach us for any kind of time-sensitive stuff ❤
And that is everything that I needed to say today, my dear friends. I am so thankful for everyone who follows my blog or who has taken the time to read this update and special request of mine…it means the world to be remembered, thought of, prayed for, and loved.